Thursday, March 25, 2010

Dear Diary,

When I first thought about starting this blog, my mind was racing all day long with things to talk about and subjects to explore. I've long since realized I not only enjoy vocalizing my thoughts, but need to get out all the chaos rolling around in my head. I have been a journal writer for years and have found that very helpful but as the kids started coming and eventually outnumbered us, my world became a very busy place. It was all I could do to keep my thoughts straight, never mind write them down! Then one day I discovered Facebook. Ok, "discovered" is not actually a fair term. I had been ignoring invitations to jump on that particular bandwagon for months. Admittedly I didn't really know all the facts but had always held the belief that people who didn't keep in touch over the years must have had a reason. Also I may not be the most computer savvy person on this planet so I will admit to being a little intimidated. Of course almost three years later I know I couldn't have been more wrong and now I enjoy some very close friendships through that social medium that I would likely never have if I'd kept my head in the sand. I found the "world at my fingertips" feeling to be intoxicating. I was also overwhelmed by the love and support from so many when my health took a turn and I found myself spending most of my days on the couch wondering what would happen next. By now my addiction to Facebook is legendary as well as a source of humor around here. Although I am finding many people are opting out of that social forum now, I see no need to deprive myself of the joy I get from checking up on all my "friends" before I start the day. And yet, these days I am finding myself needing more. As the months go on, things in that world are frankly just getting silly. The once much anticipated "profile status" has now become a place of mundane copy and paste statements that hold no interest for me. I don't care what color bra you're wearing and you shouldn't care what mine looks like. I know you support cancer/autism/the military troops/whatever but I don't need to read it on twenty generic status updates and for the record: if I don't already know when your kids are born then I probably don't need to. That sounds harsh when I read it back but my point is that Facebook of late has left me wanting more. Hence this blog. I am beginning to see it as a mix between journalling and reaching out to others, a place where I can vent and share with the small possibility of someone actually reading it! The only thing I am not use is the lack of feedback. On Facebook you write one statement and within minutes a dozen of your closest friends have a comment about it. Here, nothing. But I suppose that is the point and as I am heading down that same dark and lonely road where my health is concerned it helps to know I have a place to call my own right here.


Mandi said... need to get out of my head. I couldn't have said it better. The generic status updates on FB are driving me a bit batty and leaving me feeling more lonely for my life back home. I want to know what people are up to, not support this support that. Now don't get me wrong, I am all for support. But for those of us that are living away from home and missing it we need to know what is going on back there :) for the lack of comments on the blog, I have wondered the same thing, I feel like I am writing to myself, only a week into it I feel like maybe I should stop the blog because I don't hear from anyone and I begin to question myself, do they not like what I am writing, did I offend someone again, is it not interesting...but then I read this and realized that I am not the only one missing the immediate replys...just so you know, you are not alone.

I hope you are feeling better, we may not be close in distance, but we are as close as a few typed words, reach out to me whenever you need to. And keep up with the posts, I LOVE reading them and seeing your family.

Melanie said...

I honestly didn't know anybody else felt that way about the sensless FB status's!! I actually posted a complaint about them in one of My own status' one day!! My favorite part of FB is the status'!!
I have to tell you I love reading your blog! (Mandi's too) And I find it way more umm, what word am I looking for? Personal, I guess, than just a short FB status. I check it everyday! I enjoy it so much, that I decided to start my own...but I am kind of technology challenged!And I honestly haven't done any type of free writting since school, so I don't know how mine is going to sound!!But, I am working on it!!
Keep up the great posts!!
And ThankYou, for sharing them with me!!

Michelle said...

I am so glad to hear you are enjoying my blog Mellie! I was very iffy at first about it, like you said it has been so long since I did any real personal, free writing. But I've always loved doing it and Mandi really inspired me to get this started. I still love Facebook but for totally different reason than I'm loving this for. Good luck on your blog, don't give up and I can't wait to read it! I'll keep an eye out for the invite...:0)